I'm ready for the big entrance...

Well - - needless to say, YES, I am one week away from my dreaded due date, but this last week has been the MOST difficult for me (what with Ethan being born TWO weeks early) - - I have been anticipating the labor pains, and hoping that they will lead to the big delivery, however, I have had many many contractions, not close enough to mean anything, yet feeling like I need a sign that the end is coming! haha... I won't lie, I am more scared of this labor than I was of Ethan's, mostly because I know what to expect with this one. But I am sticking to my convictions of a drugless labor, with the support of all my family and friends. Truthfully, I'm more scared of not realizing I'm in labor! I know, crazy as it sounds, but I'm just someone who has a completely different body chemistry than most of the women I have talked to. With Ethan, I was awoke from my sleep to what I thought was a horrible moment of "peeing my pants" - - which I later learned was my water breaking. Never have I felt more ridiculous. And needless to say, contractions to me, really feel much like menstrual cramps, so what if I'm sitting here, uncomfortable as can be, having contractions, without realizing that they pains I'm feeling are labor pains? How crazy am I??? I know... These are the things that are running through my mind DAILY!

Allan has been wonderful this past week, while also anxious for the delivery, because he's looking forward to his 8 week vacation! And I don't blame him! But he's definitely been making me take every step possible. We've gone out walking, and he's even gotten to the point of requesting that I walk on the treadmill downstairs while we're watching shows. Because I'm eager to have this happen to, I'm definitely not fighting his requests. He has been far more understanding to what my body has been going through this time around, than he was with Ethan. But I think my strength through all of this has shown him how much I can handle. Today (11/7/08) marks my last day of doing childcare until after the baby is born. I will take 3 weeks off, and since Allan will still be here, we will transition back in to our daily routines. So hopefully that's a sign that she'll come by Monday! With Ethan, I worked up until "literally" the day he was born. He was born on a Monday, and I was at work the previous Friday. But every other opportunity I've had for this pregnancy to resemble his, has failed me! haha...

So now, it's all down to waiting. At my last appointment (11/3/08) she had said that I had noticeably dropped, however, my cervix was not showing much movement. She said not to be discouraged because it could change at any point, but she was sure I would be in my next clinic appointment. So far, she's right. I go in again on Monday (as long as no labor starts over the weekend) and she'll let me know where we're at there. I am hopeful I will have made some progress by that point.

I am hopeful that the next blog I post will be the arrival of this wonderful bundle of joy. I'd like to meet her. See what she's like, see who she looks like, and am more than convinced that she will be every bit as beautiful as her brother was and is! I just want to hold her in my arms, instead of in my tummy. But I'm convincing myself that it will all take place in God's perfect timing. Well... It's time to get back on my feet. Hopefully something will work in my favor!

Thanks for taking the time to read of my frustrations and fears... I hope all are doing well!!! I look forward to being able to introduce you to our wonderful blessing!